Challenge Day 1

Your goal today – prepare to take MASSIVE action by writing down your one specific goal right now in one sentence!  (Send me a DM if you don’t want to share it here!) 

It’s a common saying for a reason: You aim at nothing, you’ll reach it every time.

Check any business or fitness book and it will advise you to take massive action you must start by drilling down to your one specific goal. 

Unrealistic fears stop people from setting goals and thus taking massive action. Here are a few common ones I hear from my patients: 

  • Telling your spouse about a “negative” feeling (stops the goal: so it will dissipate)
  • Admitting to a need (stops the goal: to get it fulfilled)
  • Following up on sore subjects (stops the goal: to fully resolve them) 

These fears stop so many of my patients in their tracks. 

And the suffering continues.

To conquer the fears I always recommend breaking down large goals AND getting a guide to walk you through it.  

Small Goal Plan + Accountability = MASSIVE action.

Think of this challenge as your staircase to your massive action goal. 

But, as Steve Covey says, to build the staircase of small goals to reach MASSIVE action, we have to start at the end.  

Last things first 🙂 

A goal properly set is halfway reached.” – Zig Ziglar

So, here are several goals that were “properly set” in sessions with me.

  • Want more sex (Lame) specifically becomes Sex with my wife every Saturday morning (Legendary!)
  • Want my significant other to initiate sex more (Vanilla)  specifically becomes I want my significant other to lead me to bed one night a week. (Hot Fudge Sundae!)
  • I want more oral sex (Purr) becomes I want my wife to suggest oral sex at least once during every vacation. (Meow!)

If you’re sweating this, good! Your big goal should take a little time and energy to craft.  This is your life and your relationship we’re talking about, the two most important things in the world to you! 

Beware of FEAR as it is the enemy to setting your Massive Action Goal. 

Here are some examples of statements that indicate fear is creeping in:

  • I can’t say this! – We aren’t talking about saying anything right now. This is just you talking to yourself. (really, that doesn’t make you “crazy” I promise 🙂 )  This is not something you’re going to just drop on your wife one night like a caveman, promise.
  • She’ll never agree to this!  If I only had a dime for all  the times people squashed their dreams because of an imagined reaction!   Even imagined, if you’re letting this rule you, it will lead to resentment which will eat away at your marriage.  So don’t let an imagined future outcome cause a real current problem.
  • It will hurt her too much to hear this! Your wife is a grown woman, she can handle your feelings about your sex life (and deserves to!). In this case you’re putting your wife’s (imagined) pain in front of your own.  This is called “pathological altruism” because your “helping” someone is hurting you.  And if your pain continues guess what it does to the relationship–it hurts it, because you are half the relationship! 

So if you hear any fear statements while writing down your specific massive goal, read the above to soothe yourself and carry on, you can do this! 


 Stay tuned tomorrow for Day 2 and don’t forget to catch up with us to share your DAY 1 Progress in our Facebook Group! Questions/Comments? Call us! 757-340-8800